Miss Isabel's Diary
"From his eyes... Streams of Redemption"
As I try to organize the ideas in my mind, struggle to find the ONE emotion, the MOST significant event, the MAIN direction of what we lived during the Bla Bla Bla I just can't make up my mind... I come to the conclusion that this time the words "ONE" "MOST" and "MAIN" aren't what I should look for... what's really IMPORTANT is everything, every single little thing we lived from the intense soulful live music performance to the ecstatic draw of Jeff's guitar, passing by all the little glimpses of life, of fun and of pure nonsense.
During the French Bla Bla Bla, right after we performed the songs "Des Armes" and "Firstborn", Alex was overwhelmed with emotions and tears. He couldn't even talk, surprising and catching us all off guard as we didn't expect him to be so emotional all of the sudden! After the show (maybe you saw us as the cameras were still rolling and we were sitting there on the couches talking) we asked Alex what made him cry. From his eyes, were again streams of tears running down his half smiling, half trembling lips... He explained he wanted to talk about redemption, how after all we did or didn't do, the only fact that we were together, happier than ever before, closer to each other, determined to stand for one another... denying nothing of the dark days behind us but firmly believing they were just as significant as the most memorable success we had, the seeds of what we can see blooming today... all of it was so precious for him, making him glad and fulfilled.
Redemption...the restitution and restoration of what has been lost or bruised... the redeeming and re-payment of what I deliberately and often stupidly pawned or wasted... the complete liberation of any guilt, shackles and bitterness to walk as a free woman. Redemption is a gift I refused for too long in many fields of my life as I never found a good reason to turn my head away from it, pride being an insatiable master and selfishness being a narrow dungeon. It's with shaky hands and a confused mind that I accept redemption and live it but also with the butterflies of a first love and the nervous gladness of having a newborn.
What the whole YFE family truly applauded after this Bla Bla Bla wasn't the past successes or the envisioning of a bright future, we cheered for what we are today, as one, as what we are for one another is all we have, all we decide day after day to offer, and THAT is enough, THAT is beautiful and THAT is the "ONE" "MOST" "MAIN" "IMPORTANT" essence.
-Miss Isabel