Susan Boyle - Britain's Got Talent 2009 Episode 1 - Saturday 11th April
Please Watch This!!! For all of us who have been blinded by beauty and sometimes make prejudgements about someone's talents by their appearance and their "finish". This will amaze and touch you.
Current mood:
drained
There's a big hole where my ArtSpirit Muse can usually be found bubbling over with enthusiasm for an idea freshly hatching from YaYa's Creative Incubator.
It feels strange.....the empty quietness of it all.
I'm usually turning over possibilities in my head. Pulling out my beads and trying different color combinations and putting together different shapes and sizes to capture the effect I want to achieve.
There's usually.....So many ideas....So little time...I awake in the night to sketch an idea from my dreams...I see color combinations in the colors of the sky, flowers or the birds I've seen while walking my dogs...My hands itch to dig into a new media....
Since it's always there....bright and shining.....it's been difficult to adjust to the "dark hole" that's there now....
What is also there is the Whisperer of Self Doubt...."You've lost it and it's gone for good"..."You weren't good enough anyway"..."You're too old and you've lost your edge"...and on and on and on...
So for now...it seems that creativity has flown the coop...I can't make it happen....I do know that it feels very empty and very, very lonely..
Current mood:
enlightened
Some individuals might become irritated with the short term memory loss that starts occurring as they age. I acknowledge how frustrating it is to wander around the house trying to locate some item I had in my hands just minutes ago.....but lately....what I've really started noticing....is how many old memories I'm holding on to...not good ones either....
Remembering things that happened so many years ago that were so ugly and painful. For what? It serves no purpose. Some of the people involved are dead and others probably carry no memory of the happenings at all...They wouldn't recognize my name or my face. Why do I remember them so clearly? Why do certain incidents come creeeping into my thoughts when I least expect them? I can be waxing a floor and Tah Dah!!! Welcome to "a stroll down memory lane"....
I saw a show on Oprah awhile back about people who hoard....and I had one of those "Ahah" moments....I believe that I am a hoarder of memories....and like the individuals on the show....I've filled so many "rooms" in my house (brain) that sometimes a big pile of old useless, I thought I'd wrestled this out of my life, crap just topples over, spilling and pouring all over everything I've worked so hard to "clean up"....
So.....I've been paying attention to the memories I've been hoarding. Does it serve a purpose? When was the last time I've used it? Will I ever use it again? I've been visualizing a giant dumpster and if a memory is no longer useful...doesn't fit me anymore....not conducive to my spiritual growth....I throw the useless piece of shit in the dumpster.
I think I'll form a group..... Memory Hoarders Anonymous...Surely I'm not the only one with this condition....Am I?
Current mood:
contemplative
IF YOU RUN......YOU'RE GONNA FALL....
She's going through that clumsy stage
I heard my mother say.
Always banging up herself
You know how tomboys play.
She's learning how to ride her bike.
She's learning how to skate.
I tell her to be careful,
But my cautions come too late.
The way she runs and races
Well I'm not surprised at all
That she's got herself a split lip
If you run----You're gonna fall.
Did everyone believe her
And what she had to say
Or did she make easy
To look the other way.
YaYaWoman
2008
I cried too....Isn't it wonderful when you're having an ordinary day...I was just settling down for a little afternoon/relaxation therapy (Nap) and hadn't turned off tv yet...then on the news I heard the lead in for her story....and then I heard her sing! I was so touched, I had to find it on youtube and post to share with others...
wasn't she amazing ! i cried tears of joy for her to have such a dream come true at her age. to have a voice half that beautiful would make me sooo happy !